Or as they say in England ''what yacht are you off of''? In Scotland sailing is wet,rough and funny. There is or was an author who wrote of escapades in the sailing circles of Scotland. Anyone can remember his name let me know. Here is a snippet of my own escapades in sailing.

My father,God bless him, loved sailing. After a few short lessons on the Clyde he bought a 12ft dinghy,wooden. It looked great and my brother and I were excited about going out on the loch.

On the weekend we all went down to the shore to launch her.We had not a clue what we were doing.We had no slip-way and only a tiny trailer. We took an hour to get her in the water.She might only be 12ft but she was Clinker built we found out,weighing twice as much.

Eventually pouring with sweat we were afloat. Now how do you sail it ? We put up the sails,main and jib.The main flapped all over and we went nowhere. ''Ah,said dad,Battons. They keep the sail ridged. O.K, now were aff, sideways !!

This Yat has a mind of its own. Looking over dad was perplexed and I was getting worried.He pushed the tiller over hard to port. Still going sideways!! My father had great humour and in his wooley hat tried to look like he knew what he was doing.

Meanwhile my brother was fighting with the jib as we continued to go sideways. All I hoped was that no submarines would come up the loch or a tanker.The biggest in the world come here. Then brother looked at the wooden peg in the centre of the boat and pulled it out.

The Boom came flying over,clipped dad on the head, sent his treasured hat overboard. We started to keel over. What did dad do as we were? Leapt to the side almost capsizeing the boat, to rescue his hat. My heart was in my throat and brother was covered by the jib. ''Oh yes we lost the boys but dad saved his woolley hat''!

The boats dad had sailed before were fixed keel. This being a dinghy the keel (centreboard ) drops down by pulling out a pin.When we got ourselves back on an even keel we all laughed. It was a great day. Miss you dad.